Glee S6 Ep8 “A Wedding”

Back in the barn’s dressing room, the bridesmaids are listening to Brittany continue to freak out. She’s going to need some things for good luck since Santana saw her in her dress – and she doesn’t want to end up like Jack and Rose –  so the girls need to find her a spider, a lizard, and some glasses to smash (because Jews have good luck!). As everyone scurries to do her bidding, Santana enters.

Santana: “When I pictured my wedding day, I thought I’d be the most beautiful bride ever but I was wrong. You are, you look amazing.”

While Britt’s freak out was cute before, Santana is putting her foot down. The concept of the couple not seeing each other before the wedding is rooted in arranged marriages – the couple couldn’t see each other lest they back out. And that just doesn’t apply to them.

They love each other, and they play by their own rules. They make their own luck. And so Santana declares it’s good luck to kiss the bride before the wedding (especially since it’s a kiss they can’t have in front of their guests – they’d be too jealous).

Britt throws away the blanket she was hiding behind and they kiss, quite passionately and in a manner that actually would make people jealous. Awww. You crazy girls – you really don’t play by anyone’s rules, individually or together, which is why you are the perfect match.

Hot Mom alert!

Hot Mom alert!

This lovely moment – and a discussion on whether or not Britt should wear the blue underwear she borrowed from Tina – is interrupted by (dun dun DUN) the arrival of Sue Sylvester! And she is bearing gifts!

Or gift, which Santana is so not interested in – until she sees it’s her Abuela!

Seems like Santana’s grandmother got a visit the day before, and a dose of reverse “Sue-psychology.” We flashback to Sue pounding on “Mrs. Abuela’s” door, declaring herself the woman who made Santana’s high school years a living hell. Perhaps Mrs. Abuela would like to join Sue in ruining the wedding; a stoning? Picketing? Maybe throwing them in jail? Mrs. Lopez is horrified.

It helped her realize how wrong she’s been. And while she isn’t ready to be all “yay ladies marrying ladies,” Santana is her family and she loves her. And she doesn’t want to miss a day she’s been waiting for so long. Or babies! Or anything else the future holds.

Abuela Lopez: “I don’t want to be the person in your life that causes you pain.”

Santana doesn’t agree with her grandmother’s views, but she loves her and misses her. They embrace and Brittany is finally completely calm and relaxed.

Brittany: “I always knew Sue was my good luck charm.”

Santana mouths “you can stay, thank you” over her grandmother’s shoulder and Sue looks genuinely touched.

The Lopez ladies bring Brittany into their tearful hug and you’ll have to excuse me, there’s a branch in my eye.

Kurt and Blaine – holding hands – are admiring the beautiful barn wedding (and wondering where they got the money for it) as they are approached by Sue. She needs them immediately! Oh no, they won’t fall for that “elevator in the barn” trick. They are so wise to her.

Sue: “Oh no Porcelain, don’t thank me for forcing you back into the arms of Tiny Sal Mineo.”

Sue insists this is an actual Brittana-mergency, she swears on Will Schuester’s future grave.

Good job, Sue! You earned that seat.

Good job, Sue! You earned that seat.

Well, in that case.

In the dressing room, Kurt and Blaine enter to find two suits on stands, with cutouts of their faces attached to each. Um…

Brittany tells the boys that while she was planning her high-end barn wedding, she couldn’t stop thinking about them and not just because they remind her of the gay rat and the pig in Charlotte’s Web.

No, she was thinking about how much she looked up to them in high school. They gave her courage, and taught her there was a place for her and Santana. When they called off the wedding she was heartbroken because she felt like her dream died. And now? She wants her dream back.

Kurt gets it, as his jaw literally drops. Blaine, however…

Blaine: “Okay. I still don’t get what you’re talking about though.”

Kurt: “Yes you do. Just think about it.”

Sue interjects her own piece. Yes, out of love for their love, she and Brittany (what!? She and Brittany? Now we know who invented Jig-Sue) conspired, manipulated, and yes, briefly imprisoned them all to reach this moment.

Two tuxes – do they have two grooms?

Kurt and Blaine are incredulous and making funny faces as Brittany encourages them to say yes. Come on boys – you’ve gotten a pile of Serious Business Advice from St. Burt and also Walter, those tuxes are totally fly, and frankly, you’ve already enacted two classic movie moments earlier in the episode. The only thing left is to get hitched.

Kurt nervously laughs it off as the camera spins around him. They just got back together! This is crazy! Santana would never let this happen!

Side bar: Weak, Hummel. Weak. Also transparent. Continue.

Santana appears and oh no, that excuse is out the window, because much like the Godfather, she cannot deny her bride her one wish of the day.

Oh.

Blaine offers a helpful “We don’t even have rings” and you guys, you’re not even trying at this point.

PS: Sue has rings.

Sue: “Will you give America what 52% of them will legally tolerate?”

Kurt concedes this is romantic and sweet and weird but…but…help him out, Blaine!

Blaine, it seems, doesn’t know quite what to say. He’s thinking about what Burt and Carol said, about their months apart, how much he loves him and…and…

Blaine: “This is crazy but…”

Kurt: “But?!”

Side bar: Okay, as wacky as this seems bear with me for a second.

You may kiss the brides!

You may kiss the brides!

I’ve long espoused the belief that Kurt and Blaine’s spiritual wedding was the proposal in 501. Kurt was given away by his father, surrounded by his best girls, Blaine surrounded by his friends. A chorus of show choirs, rose petals, the exact spot they met – staged like a wedding, folks. But they were young and impulsive and not quite prepared for all of St. Burt of Hummel’s advice, not quite able to understand what was down the road. A wedding isn’t the end of strife – it’s very often the beginning. A whole new type of arguing about new things and you have to be prepared for toothpaste on the towel, intimacy issues, and stress. And you have to value those bad days as much as the good ones.

So since the break-up, they’ve both grown up and had regrets and made lives and realized that all of that crap they fought about doesn’t change the fact that they’re in love.

And now they get a romantic beautiful wedding they didn’t have to pay for, plan, or stress over. When Blaine advocates going for it, this is really what he’s talking about!

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