Glee S5 E7 – “Puppet Master”

glee puppet master featured image

Jake is choreographing a routine with the Cheerios and getting annoyed because they’re off. Or rather, Bree is off, completely losing her place in the number. He dismisses the group, but not before getting his flirt on as each girl leaves the room. Bree is furious with him.

Jake Puckerman and friends do a Janet Jackson mashup and it is glorious.

Jake Puckerman and friends do a Janet Jackson mashup and it is glorious.

In the hallway, Blaine stops Jake to thank him for standing up for his ideas at Glee Club. Are they the last two people who care about pushing everyone in an effort to succeed? Also? There’s something weird going on in the corner of the choir room – a space/time rift perhaps? Blaine tells Jake to check it out…

Fully adopting his “whatever dude” role, Jake comes to Glee Club with a chip on his shoulder, disses their dance ability, and sits in the “possibly haunted” corner. Marley rolls her eyes at his spiel and assures him his dancing is “fine, not epic.” Which sounds like a challenge, and the gas leak transports Jake to…

A Janet Jackson mashup! “Rhythm Nation/Nasty” – with Bree and the Cheerios on backup and Marley injecting her own vocals. The dancing is fantastic, as they move from the choir room, to the hallways, and finally to a black and white video replication in a warehouse. It’s one of the bigger musical numbers they’ve done in a while, and it blows the doors off the place.

Jake wakes up as Figgins kicks him out of the now empty choir room.

In art class – Blaine’s senior elective – he asks his teacher if he can move past yarn and make a puppet. Not just any puppet – a version of his fiance, who he’s missing very much right now.

Blaine and Puppet!Kurt walk down the hallway. Blaine assures his felt love that while he’s forgiven himself (for the breakup one assumes), he’s now ready to forgive Kurt. Puppet!Kurt is so grateful for this and they share a hearty laugh.

How school wide is this gas leak?

Sue takes Puppet Kurt from Blaine. Blaine is sad.

Sue takes Puppet Kurt from Blaine. Blaine is sad.

Blaine and Puppet!Kurt spy Coach Sylvester teetering down the hallway in high heels, finally wiping out in a flurry of tossed papers. He rushes to help her (no one else bats an eyelash), but she is horrified by the fact that he may have touched her with his puppet. She tells him to get rid of it, and when Blaine protests Sue freaks out, assuming his defiance is related to a lack of respect (and her lady shoes). In a few days she’ll be evaluated to see if she can continue on as principal, and crazy boys with puppets are not going to ruin her chances. Sue takes the Kurt Puppet and warns Blaine that if she sees him with his hand up anything that isn’t a person, he’s in for a world of trouble.

Blaine adopts an expression that has helped him get his way since birth. Sue is unmoved.

Sidebar: The world of Glee needs more Sue/Blaine interactions. They have such great comic timing together.

Sue dumps off the shoes and ducks into the choir room to harass Will into helping her. She lays out her dilemma – how does she attract the handsome Superintendent while retaining what makes her feel powerful and in control? He points out that a woman like Ginger Rogers was the epitome of femininity while also keeping up 100% with her dance partner, Fred Astaire. He even offers to teach her how to move like Ginger – if she’ll give him the $600 to get costumes for Nationals. Sue declines and Will leaves, but fortunately the power of suggestion and gas leak corner give her a fabulous hallucination…

Will and Sue have a long and rough history, but there’s something magical about Jane Lynch and Matt Morrison doing a classic like “Cheek to Cheek” by Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. In lush black and white, with gorgeous costumes and lovely dance moves, this number – like all the others in the episode – is just beautiful.

In their fantasies, there is only harmony and smooth moves.

In their fantasies, there is only harmony and smooth moves.

Becky is Sue’s rude awakening. She needs a mini fridge for college!

More hallway action for Jake as Bree drags him into a corner. Turns out she doesn’t want a boyfriend either, but she’s going to need Jake to accompany her to the doctor because she’s pregnant. Whoa.

In the dark of night, Blaine (in a superhero mask, of course) breaks into Sue’s office to steal back his Kurt Puppet. Sue (of course) is lying in wait, as she was sure he’d return under the cover of night to steal back his monstrous puppet bride. And now? He’s got detention, which means he’s going to miss Kurt’s band performance the following day. It seems poor choices have been made.

The next day, Blaine has the difficult task of calling his fiance and informing him that he’s not in New York, but rather in Lima, because he has detention because he tried to steal back his Kurt Puppet. Unsurprisingly, this doesn’t go over too well, particularly when an annoyed Kurt turns into furiously angry Puppet Kurt, who accuses Blaine of seeing him only as a thing he can throw aside without thought. Real Kurt hangs up and tells the newly arrived Rachel to release Blaine’s ticket. Which? Won’t be necessary.

Kurt follows her into Callbacks – which is empty. Well, there’s one person there, but he thinks Angela Lansbury is performing. Awkward.

The rest of the band is not impressed with Kurt’s choice of a venue. They told him so!

Sue needs a makeover! Unique to the rescue!

Sue needs a makeover! Unique to the rescue!

Sue has a sit down with Unique. Since her other best gay is in NY, she’s going to have to rely on Unique to help her look more like a lady. Even given their rocky past, who is Unique to turn down that opportunity? She’s got a smile and a makeup kit, ready to go.

In detention – aka the “Beckfast Club” named after repeat visitor Becky Jackson – Jake, Becky, and Blaine have eight hours to think over their miscreant ways. Blaine thinks it might be a good use of time to discuss their core wounds. Jake rolls his eyes and Becky tells him to shut his hole.

Blaine finds refuge in another puppet fantasy, where Puppet Jake and Puppet Becky are apologetic and sharing. Really, all Blaine wants in the world is to be in a John Hughes movie. He’s upset about missing Kurt’s show – his fiance needs him! But Puppet Jake wants Blaine to know they all need him. Blaine starts to think maybe this whole thing is indicative of a bigger problem – does he only feel comfortable with friends he can control? Does this point to a larger intimacy issue? Possibly, though Puppet Jake thinks that everyone should just shut up and listen to Blaine.

Also? Given that he’s now having puppet fantasies outside the choir room? It might be time for a CAT scan.

Jake ditches detention early. He meets Bree in the hallway, but the doctor visit is unnecessary. False alarm. She isn’t pregnant, and he hasn’t fully become his father (though Bree thinks it’s an inevitability. Bree tells him to stay far away from her – he’s toxic.

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