Glee, S3 Ep2 – I Am Unicorn

I Am Unicorn
Shelby Returns

I love Idina Menzel, but I thought this story was done?

Will’s making coffee in the teachers lounge when Shelby Corcoran walks in.  He’s understandably surprised to see her because when she left in the Season 1 finale she was supposed to be on her way to New York City.  Apparently Al Matta’s pockets are very deep indeed, and he’s funding an entire second show choir at the school so that his Sugar can be the lead.  See, what I don’t get here is if the Glee Club’s always been such a drain on resources, wouldn’t Figgins just take Matta’s money and end New Directions?  I mean why does the school need two clubs?  It can barely keep enough members for the first one.  Of course, that doesn’t allow for enough drama, so two clubs it is!  Will actually shows some decency in this scene and brings up both the strained relationship with Rachel, and how having Shelby and Beth back in Lima could affect Beth’s biological parents, Puck and Quinn.  But apparently Shelby’s come to make things right, aka cause some drama with those characters, so it’s okay.

Quinn and her Skanks have apparently taken a tip from “Bullying 101” and are sticking people’s faces into toilets to get them to give up their lunch money.  There’s only been two scenes with the Skanks and already I cannot wait until Quinn gives up the act so we can get rid of them already.  BORING.  Although, I do love that the one chick wanted to stab a girl with a spork.  Sue’s latest attack on the Arts is going to be a video all about how the Glee Club destroyed Quinn’s life.  Because you know, it’s their fault she slept with Puck and got pregnant before she even joined the damn club.  Quinn agrees as long as she gets a few demands, which means she wants a couch underneath the bleachers, and we’re still waiting for the rest of that list of demands.  Sue leaves and steals the lunch money Quinn just stole from that girl.  Awesome.

Campaign Posters

I spy lots of Chris Colfer, not Kurt Hummel.

In Kurt’s bedroom Brittany is showing off her poster ideas for Kurt’s campaign.  Someone pointed out that nearly every single one of those photos she used were actually pictures of Chris Colfer, and not of Kurt Hummel.  I find this highly amusing.  Of course they’re all pink, and Brittany wants 100,000 copies of each one because they are apparently going to cover every single inch of McKinley with posters.  I would love to see that Kinko’s bill.  Brittany also wants to hand out pink glittery bags called “Kurt Hummel’s bulging pink fun-sack”, full of things like Ruby slippers, a Tinky Winky toy (the supposedly gay Teletubby), a pink plastic dinosaur, a rainbow flag, and other things I can’t really identify.  Apparently Kurt’s campaign fund is on par with most Congressional funds!  Kurt’s not quite sure about this campaign, because he thinks it’s a bit too gay.  In one of her really surprisingly observant moments, Brittany comments that most of the kids at the school are either freaks or closet freaks, and that the football jocks don’t necessarily represent the entirety of McKinley High’s student body.  Obviously I get where she’s going here, and it’s great, but I’m still not okay with the unicorns.  I think I may have had one too many Lisa Frank pencils when I was a kid — it has apparently scarred me for life.  Kurt’s idea for a campaign poster is much more understated, yet glamorous; very Kurt really.  We end the scene thinking Brittany looks like a My Little Pony, and not really sure anything has been decided in this campaign.

As Puck drags Quinn along to a meeting she clearly doesn’t know the importance of, we are introduced to the whole reason for Idina Menzel’s return to the show: drama for Quinn and Puck re: their daughter Beth, which is a story that really should have ended with Shelby’s taking Beth away in Season 1.  Drama for drama’s sake isn’t good drama.  This is the kind of stuff that doesn’t really happen in real life, and I thought the writers kept saying they wanted to be grounded in reality when it came to these things?  Might as well just have the 8-year high school students and be done with it. /rant.

Shelby has decided that she doesn’t want Quinn to have to feel the pain she felt when she “gave Rachel up for adoption.”  Thing is honey, you didn’t.  You were a surrogate.  You didn’t just get pregnant on accident and ditch the kid, it was planned that way.  So your story and Quinn’s?  So not the same.  What really annoys me about this episode though is that Shelby apparently knows nothing about what is going on in Quinn’s life (to be honest, none of them seem to), but is making a lot of judgements based on her appearance.  She may not look like the squeaky clean good Christian girl she supposedly was in the previous seasons, but making rash decisions about what must be going on based on what she looks like is not okay.  Of course, I guess the audience does know something more is wrong with her, so we’re just supposed to accept this.  It’s annoying to say the least.   Quinn storms out after proving she knows nothing about motherhood (you’re not her Mom honey, you’re just the chick who gave birth to her, a Mom is someone who loves and raises you).

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